How We Handle Rejection
One of our dear sweet patrons, a favorite who shall remain nameless (unless you saw his post, or know that it's Heath Bish), sent out a cutesy little bulletin today:
Aug 3, 2006 2:21 PM
Subject: I Deleted You...
Body: well- maybe not you. but i did delete 2 ppl for this month. u might be next ;)
Now, granted, he sent it to everyone on his friends list, 'coz it was a bulletin. But for those of you too young to have witnessed the fury of a woman scorned in the film Fatal Attraction, allow us to tell you: Glenn Close was an amateur.
We want everyone to love us, and keep us in their lives. And thankfully, most people do. So we sent Heath a comment back. I was pretty damn proud of it, so I decided to make it the Lipstick Lounge blog of the week. Here, then, is our response to sweet Heath. Read and learn a little bit about what makes us tick.
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Okay... we're gonna spell it out for you:
If you delete us, bitch, we will track you down. We will hunt you like prey. We will comb the ends of the earth to find you, and then, when we do, we will let you know exactly how hurt we are that you left us. How very desperately heartbroken you have made us. We will rattle off a litany of misery that will explain to you in no uncertain terms how very devastated we are that you have chosen to shun us, to reject us, to disavow us, and to exclude us from experiencing the splendor that is you. We will also make it crystal-clear that we have no intentions of allowing the slight to go unnoticed, and that we are people of action. We will seek retribution.
As the French novelist Pierre Choderlos de Laclos said, "Revenge is a dish best served cold." So do not look for our ambush to fall swiftly. We will stew, ruminate and philosophize about the way in which we shall make you know the depth of our pain, and then, at a moment when you might have trivialized or forgotten our slight, we will appear to prove to you, sir, that we have not.
And we will be tenacious. We will stop at no barrier, spare no expense, and leave no stone unturned in our efforts to exact vengeance. We will galvanize our forces against you, and ensure our victory. And we assure you, we will have our day for the injurious slings that you may intend to thrust our way if you continue in this ruthless threat to delete us, if we have to make a lifelong crusade out of ruining you.
Because we love you like that.
Yes, like that.
Kisses!
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And we mean every word! Please, keep coming back to see us at the Lip, tell your friends what a fun time you have when you come in, spread the word about us, keep us on your MySpace, comment us often, and just generally make us the center of your world. Because, in case the creepy obsessive diatribe above didn't prove it to you.... you're the center of ours.
We're hopelessly devoted to each and every one of you.
Much love! See ya at the Lip!
Tom
Aug 3, 2006 2:21 PM
Subject: I Deleted You...
Body: well- maybe not you. but i did delete 2 ppl for this month. u might be next ;)
Now, granted, he sent it to everyone on his friends list, 'coz it was a bulletin. But for those of you too young to have witnessed the fury of a woman scorned in the film Fatal Attraction, allow us to tell you: Glenn Close was an amateur.
We want everyone to love us, and keep us in their lives. And thankfully, most people do. So we sent Heath a comment back. I was pretty damn proud of it, so I decided to make it the Lipstick Lounge blog of the week. Here, then, is our response to sweet Heath. Read and learn a little bit about what makes us tick.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Okay... we're gonna spell it out for you:
If you delete us, bitch, we will track you down. We will hunt you like prey. We will comb the ends of the earth to find you, and then, when we do, we will let you know exactly how hurt we are that you left us. How very desperately heartbroken you have made us. We will rattle off a litany of misery that will explain to you in no uncertain terms how very devastated we are that you have chosen to shun us, to reject us, to disavow us, and to exclude us from experiencing the splendor that is you. We will also make it crystal-clear that we have no intentions of allowing the slight to go unnoticed, and that we are people of action. We will seek retribution.
As the French novelist Pierre Choderlos de Laclos said, "Revenge is a dish best served cold." So do not look for our ambush to fall swiftly. We will stew, ruminate and philosophize about the way in which we shall make you know the depth of our pain, and then, at a moment when you might have trivialized or forgotten our slight, we will appear to prove to you, sir, that we have not.
And we will be tenacious. We will stop at no barrier, spare no expense, and leave no stone unturned in our efforts to exact vengeance. We will galvanize our forces against you, and ensure our victory. And we assure you, we will have our day for the injurious slings that you may intend to thrust our way if you continue in this ruthless threat to delete us, if we have to make a lifelong crusade out of ruining you.
Because we love you like that.
Yes, like that.
Kisses!
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
And we mean every word! Please, keep coming back to see us at the Lip, tell your friends what a fun time you have when you come in, spread the word about us, keep us on your MySpace, comment us often, and just generally make us the center of your world. Because, in case the creepy obsessive diatribe above didn't prove it to you.... you're the center of ours.
We're hopelessly devoted to each and every one of you.
Much love! See ya at the Lip!
Tom
posted by Thomas Horton at 2:23 PM
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